“Just Be Yourself” with a smile, and a harmless glance and your friends and family send you back to the daily struggles of being a kid. I was trying to be myself, that’s why I had few friends and but not really true friends. I was beaten up by bullies, and frankly, I talked and complained too much. My child self would probably drive my adult self-crazy…. But Wait!!! There’s more… I wouldn’t change a thing. I love who I’ve become now that I truly understand what “Be Yourself” really means.
There is always someone to answer to:
If it is God, your friends, family, boss or just yourself, everyone must answer to someone. Depending upon the level of value the other party gives you will determine how much influence they have over you. For example, if your boss says, you must cut your hair, or you’re fired, you must take a moment to understand do I need the job? How much am I making? Will my life still be adequate if I only make that amount of money?
Why can’t they just leave me alone?
Your parents or boss is bugging you because you want a tattoo, nose piercing or to grow your hair long. It’s just their opinion, but they obviously have your best interest at heart. Because some people just don’t like change, they will keep doing the same thing they have always done. They don’t believe that long hair, tattoos or piercing will stop you from being as successful as you potentially are. Your parents understand that many employers still won’t allow.
Why am I self-employed?
This is exactly where I’m at. Now I must remind you it’s not entirely of my own choice. I am chronically unemployable. That means that I will tell the truth even if I know it will cost me a job. If my boss asks me what do I think of a project, I will tell my boss exactly what I think. Unfortunately, because their identity is often tied to their own decisions, any criticisms of the project will often lead them feeling I have insulted them. This is clearly not the case, but it still leaves me unemployable due to cultural differences.
The second reason I am unemployable is that I am overqualified. I have worked really hard to be the best at my game. For almost 17 years I studied computer programming and worked as a programmer until I could spit code in my sleep. Because I didn’t have a degree, I couldn’t get into management. I decided to go back to school and study business. While in school discovered my true love… Marketing. It’s like computer programming large populations, and testing the program to see if it worked. Psychology, buying behaviors, and large quantities of data, I was at home.
My first marketing job I was a marketing specialist, then a marketing specialist level 2. I found out later I was making more than the director of marketing. After that job, I spent years marketing and selling cars. I worked my way into Director of Marketing at a private college. After being let go, I published a free newspaper and built websites. I became a turn around specialist, and help companies to avoid catastrophic failure by helping them reorganize. I was even an interim CEO of one company. Last real job I was a Director of Marketing again. I love the work, and the corporate environment, but sadly employers hire me expecting a magic bullet with instant results. But marketing is not, and in many cases, the owner’s vision doesn’t line up with their client. So I ultimately have a track record of extreme success when the Owner/CEO chooses to listen.
How do I just answer to myself?
Now I’m an Executive Advisor (Business Coach). I help companies realign their business with their clients purchasing needs and wants. I wish I could just go to work every day and get a paycheck because at the end of the day it’s far more secure. However, I am not trading time for money, and at the end of the day, I am much more fulfilled.
I am able to choose my own hours, I fire my clients, and I keep my hair long and a wild design in my beard. My life is a little more stressful, but I can keep the familypeneur lifestyle I have always desired. So I only need to answer to myself concerning my employment, and I get many freedoms others desire. Have you considered starting your own side hustle? You don’t have to quit your job to do it, but if you lose your job as many thousands of others have, it may be a great idea to always have a fallback plan.
– J –